Monday, April 28, 2008

Happy chickens?

Never underestimate the capacity of a child to overhear what parents talk about.

Jon and I have been reading books about organic and local food lately and we like to talk about them during dinner.

Last week, we ate eggs for breakfast.

In between mouthfuls, Claire said, "Are these eggs from happy chickens"?

Claire's first ballet

Last week I took Claire to her first ballet performance, a performance based on Max Lucado's book, You are Special.

Claire wasn't exactly enthralled the whole time. She frequently asked me when it would be over. She told me more than once that she was tired. She also took very seriously her job to distribute peppermints during the performance to her friends (we went with 10 neighbor kids and their moms).

Despite all of this, she was intrigued with the dancers. When one of them danced off the stage, she said in a rather loud voice, "I bet she had to go to the bathroom".

When it was over, we got to meet the dancers outside of the theater. Some of them signed Claire's program. I took pictures. This was where Claire got so excited that all she could do was suck her thumb and gaze adoringly at "the pretty dancers".

Hotel adventures

We spent the past weekend in London, ON. My cousin Michelle (aunt Michelle to our kids) just defended her PhD dissertation and we were invited to her PhD completion party.

We stayed in a hotel room with my parents, the third time we've done so. The kids absolutely loved it - the time spent with Nana and Papa, the swimming pool, the fact that there was a TV in front of the beds, that there was an elevator, that we ate out in restaurants.

The first time we stayed in a hotel (last fall when we met up with my parents in Sarnia and visited my Pake in the hospital), Claire didn't quite know what to think of it. On our way back to the hotel after eating dinner, she said, "When we get back to our new home, can I watch TV?"

We all laughed at the time, as we imagined what might be going on in her mind, on how she was trying to making sense of her new experience.

Now that I reflect on it, I realize her concept of "home" is profound. Home to her was having the people she loved be around her. Mommy, Daddy, Nana, Papa, David...throw in a few beds, towels, clothes and TV (!) and she was all set.

Why does "home" for me get so complicated with things and possessions and stuff?

Cousin Ruby's funny travel adventure

I just got off the phone with my sister Danielle. She, Paul and baby Ruby got back from a 2 week visit to Prague (to visit my brother Pete). And, within that visit to Prague, they went to Tunisia for a "resort vacation", a resort vacation that went awry, a resort vacation story that made me laugh so hard that I had tears coming out of my eyes.

I'm sure that Dan will write about it some day so I won't even try to describe it here.

But, one of the things Dan and I talked about is how traveling with kids changes the whole travel experience. One of my favorite quotes is something about how traveling is not just about seeing new horizons, but it's also about seeing with new eyes. I like it because of the reminder that traveling allows us to see new people and places, but it also nudges us to see ourselves and our place in the world differently, in ways that we weren't able to before.

I think that traveling with kids adds yet another layer to this metaphor of seeing. Though Jon and I don't have a ton of experience with this (Atlanta, Vancouver, CA being the only "far" places we've taken our kids), I've noticed that when I do travel with my kids, I am much more acutely away of my role of parent, of the responsibility I have in taking care of them. In part, I "see" new people and places through those lenses.

They remind me of something I should be aware of all the time: of what an awesome (used in the inspiring sense) and humbling role it is to be a parent.

Eating peanuts

On the way home from our weekend trip to London, ON, the kids were snacking on peanuts.

"This one looks like a dolphin in the water" Claire said, holding up half of a peanut.

Wow. I had never thought of examining peanuts for their unique shapes. I tend to just shovel them in my mouth (I have issues with eating food too quickly).

It made me remember when my siblings and I would lie in the grass of the park down the street from where we lived. We would look up at the clouds and tell each other what we thought they looked like.

Thanks Claire for reminding me of this, for reminding me to delight in things that get overlooked.

Tuesday, April 22, 2008

Dinnertime routines

When we're finished with dinner, we read the Bible (children's versions) and then sing songs. This has become quite a routine. In fact, when David has finished eating the food on his plate (a generous way to describe the little bits of food that he actually eats), he looks at me and says "Alive, Alive" (his latest favorite song).

We have quite the short list of favorite songs. For awhile it was "Swing Low, Sweet Chariot" and "Only a Boy Named David".

Now it's "Alive, Alive" and "Waves of Mercy". The kids love to run around and dance for this last song just like our song leaders did during our church retreat. Claire usually bumps into a wall or David at some point during her dance. David usually falls down in a dizzy fit because he turns around so much. But, both kids are so excited to be singing our "Bible songs" that neither one of them minds.

I don't think God does either.

Jacob is 4 months old

I can't believe that Jacob will be 4 months old tomorrow.

He's rolling over. He's laughing. He's starting to grab at toys. His cheeks are filling out (I take full credit for that). He loves to stare at things with his big blue eyes.

I can't imagine our family without him.

Claire's literacy skills

It's been so fun to watch Claire's developing literacy skills. OK. That was too grad school-ish. It's been fun to watch Claire learn how to write.

Lately, she loves to try to write new words and will ask me, letter by letter, how to spell them.

She likes to write the words on white paper and sometimes composes them into a card or a list.

She then likes to put them in an envelope and place it in our mailbox for the mail carrier to take.

MONK-e-mail

David has become obsessed with watching MONK-e-mails.

Every time he sees my computer, he says "funny monkey mom". And sometimes, if he's really desperate to see it, he'll add "peese?" in a slightly higher and quieter and softer tone that demonstrates he's mastered the art of pleading.

I usually give in.

Claire's first movie theater experience

Yesterday Grandma took Claire to the movie theater for the first time.

They had a wonderful time watching Horton hears a Who.

When I asked her what it was like, she told me that the "TV" was as big as "Eli's TV" (which is actually isn't). She then launched into a long plot summary of the film.

And then, when it was time to put on play clothes, she went into hysterics because we couldn't find her shorts.

Ah. Being a mom sometimes means that I pick up the pieces when the excitement of a new experience dies down and my kid realizes how exhausted she really is.

Festival of Faith and Writing

For the third time, I took a baby with me to Calvin's biannual Festival of Faith and Writing. In 2004, it was with 4 month old Claire. In 2006, it was with 2 month old David. This past weekend it was with Jacob.

I always enjoy going to this festival. It's just fun to be around other people who love literature. It's inspiring to hear what smart and gifted writers have to say. And, it's always a blast to hang out with my mom, her friend Willene, and my sisters (when they can come). This year, Sarah and Mom Van Duinen came.

This year I went to many of the sessions geared toward children's/young adult literature. It was a new experience for me. In the past, I've always gone to hear authors that I have read for my own personal enjoyment (e.g. David James Duncan, Annie Dillard. Elie Wiesel, Chaim Potok, Anne LaMott). This year, because I'm teaching a children's literature course and will be teaching a young adult literature course, I experienced a whole new Festival dimension. I attended sessions led by Jon Muth, Kadir Nelson, Carole Weatherford, Joan Bauer among others.

And, as I stood in the back of the rooms where these sessions were held, holding Jacob and trying to keep him relatively quiet, I realized that I have my kids to thank for this new experience. I made the decision to teach a children's literature course at MSU because it seemed the most logical thing to do. I was reading books to my kids. Why not teach a course about children's books?

I never thought I would enjoy either of them so much.

Tuesday, April 15, 2008

A poem I like...

Let Evening Come

Let the light of late afternoon
shine through the chinks in the barn, moving
up the bales as the sun moves down.

Let the cricket take up chafing
as a woman takes up her needles
and her yarn. Let evening come.

Let dew collect on the hoe abandoned
in the long grass. Let the stars appear
and the moon disclose her silver horn.

Let the fox go back to its sandy den.
Let the wind die down. Let the shed
go black inside. Let evening come.

To the bottle in the ditch, to the scoop
in the oats, to air in the lung
let evening come.

Let it come, as it will, and don't
be afraid. God does not leave us
comfortless, so let evening come.

Jane Kenyon

Sunday night game night

We've started a new tradition in our family - game night on Sunday nights. We've been doing it for about a month now so I feel that we can now describe it as a tradition :)

The idea behind it is that we play games together as a family. Each family member gets to choose one game (Go Fish, Ring around the Rosey, Candyland) and then we all play it together.

We play Peek-a-boo with Jacob.
David usually likes to play Duck-duck-goose.
Claire has enjoyed Go Fish (but hates to lose).

Their favorite game though is "Jump on Daddy".

Jon and I both came from families who always went to church on Sunday evenings. And, to be honest, it sometimes stills feel strange not to go to a PM service on Sundays.

But, I have to say, Sunday night game night is a lot of fun. We laugh a lot. We enjoy each others' company. I think God enjoys it as well.

Discipline of celebration

A friend of mine gave me Shauna Niequist's Cold Tangerines for my birthday. I've been indulging myself over the last few days and reading through it.

In the introduction, Niequist writes:

The discipline of celebration is changing my life, and it is because of the profound discoveries that this way of living affords to me that I invite you into the same practice. This collection is a tap dance on the fresh graves of apathy and cynicism, the creeping belief that this is all there is, and that God is no match for the wreckage of the world we live in. What God does in the tiny corners of our day-to-day lives is stunning and gorgeous and headline-making, but we have a bad habit of saving the headlines for the grotesque and scary.
...To choose to celebrate in the world we live in right now might seem irresponsible. It might see frivolous, like cotton candy and charm bracelets. But I believe it is a serious undertaking, and one that has the potential to return us to our best selves, to deliver us back to the men and women God created us to be, people who choose to see the best, believe the best, yearn for the best. Through that longing to be our best selves, we are changed and inspired and ennobled, able to see the handwriting of a holy God where another person just sees the same old tired streets and sidewalks.

Great words. Words that I continually need to be reminded of. It's so easy for me to fall into cynicism and pessimism, to be overwhelmed at the brokenness in the world.

Living out one of my fantasies

This morning Grandma watched the boys (Claire was at preschool) and I left to do some grocery shopping. I even managed to sneak in a trip to Target and bought a bathing suit.

When the kids are with me on my shopping mornings, I fantasize about them not being there. I think about the luxury it would be to just browse the aisles in peace and quiet. I think about how I used to read the magazines in the checkout lane, catching up on the latest tabloids.

This morning, I browsed the aisles. I compared prices with total concentration. I read the magazines in the checkout lane.

But, I also missed the kids.

Grandma's here

Yesterday we picked up Jon's mom (Grandma) from the GR airport. On the way there the kids saw an airplane in the sky and we all shouted out greetings to Grandma.

It was fun.

Saturday, April 12, 2008

Cheese

I think I will forever associate "cheese smell" with Jacob.

It's not his fault.

It's that Jon and I aren't very good at cleaning under his double chin/neck.

Breakfast conversation

One thing I'm learning in my motherhood experience is that you just can't predict when kids will want to talk about things. Perhaps I should have know this from my own experience but it continues to surprise, and delight me.

At breakfast the other day, as I was shoveling granola in my mouth, reading the paper, making sure David only ate one vitamin,
Claire said (in between her bites of cereal),
"We ate tacos yesterday with Dad"
A few minutes later she told me that she watched "Nemo" at Jen's dorm (Jen's our babysitter).
Then, she told me that Lydia and Amelia are her friends at preschool.

I used to think that asking kids the "right" kind of questions would provide the glimpses into their thoughts and experiences. I'm beginning to realize that it's not so much the questions but more the time spent with them.

Monday, April 7, 2008

So incredibly blessed

There are moments when I wish that I didn't live so far away from Michigan State, that I didn't have to do the 1.5 hour drive each way once or twice a week, that I could go to more of the events and talks and get-togethers on campus. Living in Holland definitely makes my experience as a grad student at MSU more difficult.

But, Jon and I decided to stay in Holland when I started the PhD program because of the community we experienced here, because of the relationships with friends that were important to us.

Tonight I got to tangibly experience this community, this reason we decided to stay here. Kathy and Kristen threw me a surprise birthday party. And, for the first time in my life, I was completely surprised. There at the restaurant was my all star line up of my favorite female friends (give or take a few who were on spring break), a whole group of them representing a variety of ages, interests, and connections to me, there to enjoy drinks and dessert on this the first day of my new year of life.

I'll be thinking about all of them and about the community they are to me, to Jon, to our family, when I make the long drive to campus tomorrow.

"I just like them that way"

Claire loves to write her name on just about anything. This has been going on for quite a few months. Recently though, she's been wanting to write other words as well. So far, her word list consists of:

Claire
David
Jacob
Mommy
Daddy
Yes
No
Stop

Today she wrote "stop" on a sheet of paper. I looked at it and then said something about how she had written the "s" and the "p" backwards.

She looked up at me. "I just like them that way" she said.

Sunday, April 6, 2008

Crying in God's presence

This morning as I walked into church carrying Jacob, he started crying. Actually, it was more than just crying. He started screaming.

I can learn from him.

How I sometimes long to cry so openly, to scream about the brokenness that I see around me, to weep over the realities of living in a sinful world.

But I don't. Adults are supposed to have it all together, especially in church.

If church is really a place for us to experience God, a God who is God of all our emotions, then maybe Jacob understands this much more than I do.

Maple syrup and cows...

The other day at breakfast, as we were eating our pancakes, I asked Claire if she knew where maple syrup came from.

She promptly replied, "From a cow" (can you tell we've been talking with her about where our food comes from?)

She then said "From a pig?"
Then it was, "From a chicken?"
And, then, "From the ground?"

Ah, we have much to work on with her...

"Is it a TV day today Mom?"

It's always funny to hear Claire picking up one of my sayings/phrasing of words, questions, comments.

Here are a few that I've overhead her say lately:

"David - what's your deal?"
"Jacob - what's your problem?"
"David, be quiet. I am getting a headache with all this noise."
"Is it a TV day today Mom?"
"David - these are your choices..."
"Mom, I can't get the book because I just sat down."
"I'll do it in a minute, I'm busy right now."

Friday, April 4, 2008

Is it too early to tell?

Jon and I think that David will be the class clown.

Honestly, the kid will do anything for a laugh. He will even laugh himself. And, once he starts laughing, it's pretty darn hard not to laugh right along with him.

On Thursday it was jungle day at Claire's preschool. On the way home from picking her up, Claire and I were talking about what she learned. With Claire, it's sometimes hard to get an answer or response on demand. Yesterday was one of those times. I asked her if she learned about cows. After much silence, she said "No". I asked if she learned about lions. She said, in her quiet voice, "Yes". Then I asked if she talked about pigs. Before I could respond, David started snorting like a pig over and over and over. That was funny. But what was even funnier was that in trying to snort like a pig, David uses his whole body and in his excitement, sometimes when he tries to snort, no noise comes out.

He made us all laugh. How I love that kid.

things I love

I love watching babies fall asleep, their eyes moving in strange ways before the lids close down.

I love the smell of their breath after they take their long afternoon naps.

I love the feel of their hands around my neck when I carry them up the stairs.

I love coming into their bedrooms late at night and tucking them in.

I love reading stories to them and having them snuggle next to me on the couch.

I love to kiss them on their foreheads.

I love to hear them play.

I love to hear them tell me stories.

Little House and the Fairy

I've been reading Little House on the Prairie books to Claire in the afternoon when the boys are napping.

We have a nice little routine going. We make our chai tea, we snuggle in on the living room couch with blankets and then start reading.

Claire's been calling me "Ma" and Jon "Pa". She is Laura, David is Mary and Jacob is baby Carrie.

She also seems to think that the book is called Little House and the Fairy.

To be honest, I'm not sure how much she's understanding. To be really honest, I'm not sure how much I understand either (making a smoke house in the back to smoke the venison? I'm still confused as to how Pa made it).

But, just when I start to think that what I've been reading is way over her head, she surprises me with something. Today it was that, out of the blue, she said to me, "Mom, Wilbur is some pig, and terrific. That's what Charlotte wrote about him."

Tuesday, April 1, 2008

David's favorite books

When David finds a book he enjoys, he wants to it read to him over and over and over. And then over again.

We've been through the book entitled Cow(Doyle/Rinaldi). David knew every single page and had hand motions or noises to go with each one.

Now, it's Caps for Sale (Slobodkina), or "the monkey book" as David likes to call it. He acts out the monkeys. So very naturally.

He's also a big fan of the No David! series (Shannon). I worry that he's been getting ideas from these books, particularly the one about running naked down the street. He has yet to run outside naked but he loves to run around the house. Talking all his clothes off while playing in the attic and then doing somersaults, much to the amusement of Claire's three friends who were over at the time, was pure bliss for him.

It's a slow day...

Never underestimate the power of a Raffi song.

I had to pick up my antibiotics yesterday morning at the local pharmacy and so desperately wanted the whole experience to go quickly.

In the parking lot, I repeated asked the kids to "hurry" and "walk faster".

At one point Claire replied, "I can't Mom. It's a slow day today."

She said it just like how Raffi sings it.